Notes: don’t worry, I know what it’s like to wake up in cat puke. I’m an expert in what I write ;)

As for the fore- and hindtail, I don’t know about English, but we Germans use “Tail” not only for an animals’s prolonged spine (I decided to give Inuyasha a tail..) but also for “prick” or “weenie”. English, too? ‘d be convenient if so.

*Houjo-kun during one of the very lat episodes of the TV series

 

The sky was still red when he woke, still lying in Kagome’s bed. Although he was dizzy because his head had been resting on the hard diary, his senses told him that he was still alone. Quite unhappy about that, he pulled the book out from under his head and tried to fall back asleep.

 

That was when he heared a pumping noise. A very unhealthy one. And somehow, his haunch was being massaged at the pumping’s rhythm. When these informations materialized into Buyo being about to barf on him because that fat cat had been sleeping on him, it was already to late. With an icky “Nya-raaarrrrrrrrghl”, Buyo puked all over his haunch, it ran down his legs and messed up Kagome’s bed…

 

Inuyasha slowly rose into a sitting position. He should not have done that. Now his butt got soaked in it.

“Oh dammit…” he muttered as he was about to wipe it off, but reconsidered as he wouldn’t want it on his hands. Much as he’s a dog who appreciates gross things, this was one step too gross for his semi-human half.

Carefully not to dirty the floor, he tiptoed to Kagome’s closet and searched it for some pants his size. When he had his hand on the knob, he hesitated. He remembered having had his hand there before and Kagome had scolded him bad. “The one thing a boy musn’t touch is a girl’s closet!”

The memory of fiercly being SAT after he asked “What girl?” was still vivid, but so was the stech of the cat puke on his rear, so he opened the closet and had a thorough look.

 

He was lucky that Kagome liked comfortable clothes at home which meant she had a rather large pair of joggings.

He untied the ribbon that held his hakama tight and let it slip on the floor. More stench struck his nose and he decided to take both the jogging pants and the hakama to the bathroom. Half naked with his hakama-shita covering his fore- and hindtail to preserve his dignity - the hindtail was curled like a pig’s, the foretail could be longer if you asked Inuyasha – he knelt down to inspect the white box which Kagome’s mother had taught him to be a washer.

 

“Eto… uh… yeah, put that powder in it, twist this button and… oh, ‘s that all? Keh, easy!”

 

Little did he know that there were various washing modes fit for various purposes…

Debonair, he changed into Kagome’s red jogging pants which had a white button-down line on each leg’s lateral side.

When he was about to walk out of the bathroom, his eyes caught the sight of the toilet. A sight which, as we all know, stimulates your guts. But not his intestines reported, no, his stomach did. His cheeks blew like balloons as the butter-like scent that came with the cake, floated up his gullet and reminded him of the lardy consistence of that snack.

What shot up through both his desperately covered mouth and his nostrils to which his stomach had diverted the semi-digested cake because the mouth was being covered, looked very familiar. Not because that’s what he’d been stuffing into himself, but because it was on his hakama, the floor, Kagome’s bed and in Buyo’s stomach.

‘Oops… if we both barf the same, means it was rotten…” The very graphic thought of everything his mind associated with rotten – corpses, food, old feces, Naraku, Sesshoumaru, bad food – invited his stomach to do a major spring-cleaning and so he knelt over the toilet, his stomach convulsing to get it all out.

 

When he was finally empty, so was his head. Puking too much too fast will cause gasses to make you even more sick, plus dizzy. Choking on puke that was not there, he stumbled out of the bathroom, forgetting to flush. Most went off target anyway…

 

What he needed now was fresh air. On his way out to the terrass, he fell over Buyo who didn’t dodge. When Inuyasha rose his foot to shove – or catapult? – the fat cat out of his way, he noticed that Buyo still wasn’t moving. He just sat there, a blank look, his snout covered in what Inuyasha had just been throwing up as well.

The dog demon poked the cat blubber. No reaction beside a sick “Moooow…” from a barely opened, filthy yap. Inuyasha frowned. This cat was seriously sick from that cake! The poor animal really did look bad and Inuyasha didn’t feel good to just go and leave him.

 

In a pathetic attempt of first aid, he took the suffering cat by its hindlegs and held him headfirst, “gently” (in his terms) shaking the poor thing. He hoped he’d get it all out that way, but his brilliant plan failed miserably and now, the cat could not even stand anymore.

 

Inuyasha remembered how Kagome’s family cherished that useless lump of fat and fur, and he wouldn’t want to be SAT for letting him die. But he was no vet nonetheless. He quickly put on the baseball cap that Kagome had bought for him to cover his ears.

 

The fat cat dangling from both his arms, he ran out to the street to get help. A boy wearing the same uniform as the idiot he’d once been on stage against* got his attention.

“Hey, you!” he barked, startling the boy. “Hey you, can you help this stupid cat? ‘s gotta foodpois’nin’ an’ me too!”

The boy, still paralyzed, described him the way to a vet and without saying “Thanks” or anything close, Inuyasha stormed past him in the direction the boy had indicated.